3. You don’t want to change him.
Do you love him just the way he is? Does he
love you for you? If you have major changes you are hoping happen in
his life, he is not “the One.”
You can not marry someone hoping they’ll
change. Is he a smoker? Drunkard? Just like he should not marry you
hoping you will wake up one day and be a different person. Major
changes sound like, “I really hope he stops drinking”; “I’m praying
for him to believe in God”, “I wish he could just change and come
with me to church and be committed in following God”; “I am hoping
he will open up to the idea of children some day.”
You love being with him. You have fun together.
If you could not make out with him, would you just enjoy being
around him? Are you friends?
The rich companionship in marriage is my
favorite part. I am telling you, “James makes me laugh more than
anyone I know, and I have more fun with him than I could have
5. He is a servant leader.
Lately, I have heard horror stories of
“Christian men” berating their wives and running their households
like a dictatorship.
Jesus demonstrated for men the way husbands
should love their wives—leading by serving. James is an incredible
example of this style of leadership, and he never demands that I
“submit to his authority.”
Can you trust him to lead your family? Or will
you have to do all the heavy lifting and he watches you?
6. You are on the same life path.
Do you want the same things from life? Are you
able to agree on a common family goal? Despite slight differences in
opinion, does he think closely with you? In terms of setting and
achieving life’s goals? These are important. Talk about the future
now and seriously consider if compromise is possible or if you need
to move on. It may not seem like a big deal now, but it will become
one some day. Remember, there is no divorce in Christian marriage.
7. You have a voice in your relationship.
Does he make you feel special? Do your opinions
matter, or is it all about him?
You will suffer in the long run if you have to
put your dreams and goals under the carpet because he doesn’t see
them as valuable.
Chivalry doesn’t mean you’re not a feminist and
it isn’t degrading.
Does he care for you and keep you safe? Treat
you with respect? Do you feel special when you’re with him? Would he
do anything within his power to protect you?
Passivity is eating away at many men, and you
want to marry a man who rejects the urge to sit back.
In summary here money has not been mention, not
because it has less importance. It has a great role in marriage as
the bible rightly puts it, “Money answereth all things”. Money
should not be the basis for judging a man. The bible again says
money wings that they can fly. What if the latter happens? Did I
hear you say God forbid? I agree with you but the advice here is
consider the other factor before money so you donot hurt yourself in
your entire life-time. God bless you.
What would you add to the list? Especially if
you are married and if you are married, I would love for the single
ladies to read in your contributions how you knew your husband was
“the One.” Please write to us
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