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3. You don’t want to change him.

Do you love him just the way he is? Does he love you for you? If you have major changes you are hoping happen in his life, he is not “the One.”

You can not marry someone hoping they’ll change. Is he a smoker? Drunkard?  Just like he should not marry you hoping you will wake up one day and be a different person. Major changes sound like, “I really hope he stops drinking”; “I’m praying for him to believe in God”, “I wish he could just change and come with me to church and be committed in following God”; “I am hoping he will open up to the idea of children some day.”

4. Companionship.

You love being with him. You have fun together. If you could not make out with him, would you just enjoy being around him? Are you friends?

The rich companionship in marriage is my favorite part. I am telling you, “James makes me laugh more than anyone I know, and I have more fun with him than I could have imagined”.

5. He is a servant leader.

Lately, I have heard horror stories of “Christian men” berating their wives and running their households like a dictatorship.

Jesus demonstrated for men the way husbands should love their wives—leading by serving. James is an incredible example of this style of leadership, and he never demands that I “submit to his authority.”

Can you trust him to lead your family? Or will you have to do all the heavy lifting and he watches you?

 

6. You are on the same life path.

Do you want the same things from life? Are you able to agree on a common family goal? Despite slight differences in opinion, does he think closely with you? In terms of setting and achieving life’s goals? These are important. Talk about the future now and seriously consider if compromise is possible or if you need to move on. It may not seem like a big deal now, but it will become one some day. Remember, there is no divorce in Christian marriage.

7. You have a voice in your relationship.

Does he make you feel special? Do your opinions matter, or is it all about him?

You will suffer in the long run if you have to put your dreams and goals under the carpet because he doesn’t see them as valuable.

8. Graciousness.

Chivalry doesn’t mean you’re not a feminist and it isn’t degrading.

Does he care for you and keep you safe? Treat you with respect? Do you feel special when you’re with him? Would he do anything within his power to protect you?

Passivity is eating away at many men, and you want to marry a man who rejects the urge to sit back.

In summary here money has not been mention, not because it has less importance. It has a great role in marriage as the bible rightly puts it, “Money answereth all things”. Money should not be the basis for judging a man. The bible again says money wings that they can fly. What if the latter happens? Did I hear you say God forbid? I agree with you but the advice here is consider the other factor before money so you donot hurt yourself in your entire life-time. God bless you.

What would you add to the list? Especially if you are married and if you are married, I would love for the single ladies to read in your contributions how you knew your husband was “the One.” Please write to us

 

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